Call center! Anyone?

Recently, we had heard about a “polite gal” screwed the call center guy with all kinda flirthy words and insulted him badly. I don’t wish to further elaborate on this matter as it sold like hot cake on my blog here hehe.

People always think that whoever works in an environment that they need to answer the calls they are working in call center. Wrong! Call Centers are meant for level 0 users where they have 0 level technical knowledge where the agent has to educate them in proper way i.e. StreamyX, Helpdesk is more technical whereby most of the time the users will be a bit well verse with the techincal jargons and term and most of the time the agents will be able to troubleshoot the issue with giving them guidance via phone or remote troubleshooting tools. And Service Desk is more High End where by engineers will have more technical knowledge and they are expected to solve the issue on their end itself and service desk engineers doesn’t only handle calls but always emails and change request. And service desk environment is more like supporting their internal customers.

I know this pretty well because i was from the service desk environment as well. It’s pretty irritating when people ask you where you work and you tell them service desk engineer and they will give the “looking-down-at-u” kinda look and say ooohh call center a? hey u dumb fcuk who cant even diffrenciate what is call center and servicedesk, stop rating on us, allright. What i am trying to say is never look down at others job and mind you, im not mocking on the call center staff or the job nature. Infact, call center agents are more proffesional in handling customers as the users are always losers who think they are hell of great and i hate Mahatma Gandhi for saying “Customer is Always RIGHT!”, argh fuck that tag line larr”

The Government should come up with a law as illustrated below:

I would like to share some call center, help desk and service desk environment jokes that the dumb losers user does. cheers!! and to all my mates whom are working in call centers, helpdesk and service desk, you are the best!! yeah, u heard me right, YOU ARE THE BEST!!! You will never know what kinda shit are we they going through daily from the customers and users, and you bloody green eyed monsters, stop envying their slightly higher salary and claim their are overpaid, try to work on shift and get all the shit and you talk, ok?

Enjoy the joke:

1) Tech Support : “I need you to right-click on the Open Desktop.”

Customer : “Ok.”

Tech Support : “Did you get a pop-up menu?”

Customer : “No.”

Tech Support : “Ok. Right click again. Do you see a pop-up menu?”

Customer : “No.”

Tech Support : “Ok, sir. Can you tell me what you have done up until

this point?”

Customer : “Sure, you told me to write ‘click’ and I wrote ‘click’.”

———— ——— ———

2) Customer : “I received the software update you sent, but I am still

getting the same error message.”

Tech Support : “Did you install the update?”

Customer: “No. Oh, am I supposed to install it to get it to work?”

 ———— ——— ———

 3) Customer : “I’m having trouble installing Microsoft Word.”

Tech Support : “Tell me what you’ve done.”

Customer : “I typed ‘A: SETUP’.”

Tech Support : “Ma’am, remove the disk and tell me what it says.”

Customer : “It says ‘[PC manufacturer] Restore and Recovery disk’.”

Tech Support : “Insert the MS Word setup disk.”

Customer : “What?”

Tech Support: “Did you buy MS word?”

Customer: “No…”

 ———— ——— ———

 4).Customer : “Do I need a computer to use your software?”

Tech Support : ?!%#$ (welll pretend to smile)

 ———— ——— ———

 5).Tech Support : “Ok, in the bottom left hand side of the screen, can you see the ‘OK’ button displayed?”

Customer : “Wow. How can you see my screen from there?”

 Tech support : ##### ***

 ———— ——— ———

 6) Tech Support : “What type of computer do you have?”

Customer : “A white one.”

Tech support : ******_____# ###

 ———— ——— ———

 7). Tech Support : “What operating system are you running?”

 Customer : “Pentium.”

 Tech support : ////—–+++

———— ——— ———

 8). Customer : “My computer’s telling me I performed an illegal

abortion.”

 Tech support : ??????

 ———— ——— ———

 9).Customer : “I have Microsoft Exploder.”

 Tech Support : ?!%#$

———— ——— ———

10).Customer : “How do I print my voicemail?”

 Tech support : ??????

 ———— ——— ———

 11). Customer : “You’ve got to fix my computer. I urgently need to print document, but the computer won’t boot properly.”

Tech Support : “What does it say?”

 Customer : “Something about an error and non-system disk.”

 Tech Support : “Look at your machine. Is there a floppy inside?”

 Customer : “No, but there’s a sticker saying there’s an Intel inside.”

 Tech support : @@@@@

———— ——— ———

 12). Tech Support: “Just call us back if there’s a problem. We’re open

24 hours.”

 Customer: “Is that Eastern time?”

 ———— ——— ———

 13). Tech Support : “What does the screen say now?”

 Customer : “It says, ‘Hit ENTER when ready’.”

 Tech Support : “Well?”

 Customer : “How do I know when it’s ready?”

 Tech support : *** —- ++++

———— ——— ———

 The best of the lot

 14). customer care officer: I need a product identification number right now and may I help u in finding it out?

Cust: sure

CCO: could u left click on start and do u find ‘My Computer’?

Cust: I did left click but how the hell do I find your computer !!